Love Language Test for Couples

This free love language test asks 30 quick either-or questions and ranks all five love languages for you: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service and Physical Touch. When you finish, send the link to your partner. They take it on their own phone and you both see your results side by side, with a pair card and ideas for each other. No email, no account, and it takes about 4 minutes.

How does the couples love language test work?

1. Answer 30 either-or questions. Each one shows two ways someone could show you love. Pick the one that would mean more, even if you like both. Each language is tested against every other language three times, so the ranking is fair.
2. See your full ranking. You get your top love language, your score for all five, a few lines to tell your partner and ideas you can send them.
3. Bring your partner in. Tap Send to my partner to share a link, or Take it on this phone to hand the phone over. Your result stays hidden while they answer.
4. Open your pair result. Two rankings side by side, what clicks for your pair, where you can miss each other, and things each of you can try this week, for together or long distance.

Your answers stay on your phone. A partner link carries the answers inside the link itself, so nothing is sent to a server. Come back later and your result is still there, and if you retake it in a few months the test shows what changed.

What are the 5 love languages?

Gary Chapman, a marriage counselor, described five ways people tend to give and receive love in his 1992 book The 5 Love Languages. Here is what each looks like in everyday life.

Want the long read with examples for each? See our guide to the five love languages.

Love language compatibility: does it matter if ours are different?

No. Different love languages are common and they are not a warning sign. A 2024 review of the research by psychologists Emily Impett, Haeyoung Gideon Park and Amy Muise found no evidence that couples with matching love languages have better relationships. People were happier when they received any of these kinds of love. The researchers suggest thinking of love as a balanced diet rather than one favorite dish.

What a different result does tell you is where you can miss each other. If you show love by doing the dishes and your partner waits to hear “I love you”, you are both trying and neither of you feels it. Open the Compatibility chart tab in the tool and tap any two love languages to see that pair card, even before you take the test.

Which love language is cooking, gaming or sending memes?

Most everyday gestures count as one love language and often a second one. Cooking for someone is Acts of Service; cooking with them is Quality Time. Sending memes is a small version of Words of Affirmation and Gifts, because it says “I thought of you”. The Which language is it? tab looks up 45 common gestures.

How do love languages work in a long distance relationship?

Words and Quality Time travel well. Gifts take a bit of planning. Acts of Service and Physical Touch are the hardest from far away. Every result in the test has a Long distance switch with ideas made for being apart, for example:

• Physical Touch: send a hoodie you have worn and fall asleep on a video call. Keep a countdown until you see each other.
• Quality Time: plan a video date with a start time and play a game instead of only talking. Our long distance date ideas help.
• Acts of Service: book the tickets for the next visit, or send a grocery delivery in a busy week.

Physical Touch when you live apart: 5 ideas

1. Send a hoodie or shirt you have worn, and ask for one of theirs.
2. Fall asleep on a video call, phones on the pillow.
3. Book the next visit before this one ends, so the next hug has a date.
4. Mail a soft blanket you both use during calls.
5. Plan the first hour of the next visit together, down to the first hug at arrivals.

More in our long distance relationship tips.

What are the limits of this test?

• It is a conversation starter, not a diagnosis. Self-report quizzes measure what you say you prefer today.
• Either-or questions force a choice you rarely face in real life. Most people like all five, so look at the whole ranking and not only the top.
• Your needs can change with stress, a new job, a baby or a move. Retake it now and then.
• This is an unofficial test with our own questions. The official quiz from Chapman's publisher is free at 5lovelanguages.com.

What to do after the test

1. Each of you picks one idea from the pair result and does it this week.
2. Talk about one time you felt really loved by the other, and why.
3. Then learn how you each like to make up after a fight with the apology language quiz, and how you each argue with the conflict style quiz for couples.
4. Keep talking with our questions to ask your partner or test how well you know each other with the couples quiz.